Observations on Unemployment

Or the active practice of the freelance lifestyle.

First, I need to double up on my toilet paper purchasing. A four pack used to last me what seemed like a month. I hadn't factored in the increase rate of pee at my last TP purchase. Upon observation, it has increased exponentially. I suppose I am left with only two options: invest in the 8-pack or wipe less often.

I hope the hundred-year old plumbing holds up with the corresponding increased rate of flush.

Second, increased consumption rate also applies to the heat. Once realized, I now walk around with a blanket draped over my shoulders at all times. Coupled with the pink fuzzy slippers and the constant din of the argument with the cat, I have now become the crazy neighbor. I must say, though, the view is much nicer from this side of the table--less judgmental and more free.

I shall sing on the top of my lungs while slow dancing with said kitty in rejoice.

Third, same consumption rate applies to food. Must now factor in three meals plus snacks when at grocery store. Must break free of my shopping habit to favor dinnertime foods. Besides, I have grown tired of eating seitan for breakfast. Must also remember this in future.

Fourth, the active practice of the freelance lifestyle is neat. Literally. My kitchen is rather spotless, dishes always done, and bed always made. Cleaning is such a productive form of procrastination.